damn

it’s too early to be up so late.

i have been trying to write, but i’m too wired to write well.

the strangest thing about my writing recently is that i’m at this stage where i feel a change coming and i’m impatient for it to happen.

this recent series of “jim poems” is weak, i know, on the surface, but i’ve got the definite feeling that somewhere in there is the seed of something really exciting. i haven’t been putting all of them up here because i feel so odd about them right now; not sure where all of them will lead or how many will stay around.

i’ve also been working hard on the curriculum for the online course. i expect it to be completed before monday.

it’s such a strange time…i’m starting to feel really discouraged by the whole freelance/contractor process. things i thought were happening keep being postponed, and i really want to work. i’m not bored so much as i feel useless right now. after 25 years in the workforce, this is the longest i’ve been out of work ever. ever. i’m reaching the point where i might just take a full time job and forget the whole thing. it’s so hard to feel so useless.

well, springer’s on, so i can feel superior for a few minutes, anyway.