Category Archives: poetry

As American As Petting A Bison

Some context for this: 

How To Lose Your Pants By Being Dumb

If I were to become a bully
I’d do my business
righteously, historically.

I’d fill my raging belly
with ghost egret flesh,
drink nothing but spectral bison’s tears,

grow horns
the size of a railroad car
and start looking around

for a bison-petting tourist with 
jeans and blood to spare.
Watch them run away after trying 

to pet me. Thinking
I’m tame. Believing the 
schoolbooks they’d seen.

You’d think I’d have learned
about how such behavior
tends to pan out over time.

You’d think that — and you’d
be wrong. This is mild. It isn’t about 
replicating their history of violence.

There’s a whole country out there
the wants us lovable enough
to keep on a shelf in the living room.

Someone’s got to set them straight
in the name of survival. Put them
pantsless on the hook

for everything 
they never learned in school
or subsequently.

It’s not their fault, you say,
that they bought the myth they were sold.
But it is. It’s not like 

they haven’t been told.
Anyway, I’m starting small.
No need to panic yet. 

Your jeans 
don’t begin to pay off
what was stolen, but it’s a start.


What Drives Me

Bags filled with
broken promises and
hands full of random illnesses
and injuries: that’s where I am
in this late middle age.  I have
the residuals of bad choices
to weigh me down
and of course
the words, the Work,
always and forever
driving me.

To feel better
I’d give up a lot, 
but not the drive, not the Work.
I’d let blacktop cover me,
let the city take my home, 
let me fall on a sidewalk
outside the library.  Let them
use me as a warning, let them
slip me into forgotten history
and leave me there — but the Work

shall remain on my tongue
poised for release
then fight its way past
my light stripped eyes through
frozen fingers into the world
where it will live or not on its own
because that’s my Work 
and I’m not done with my job.
I’m not quitting it just to die
at peace with my body
and my wallet. No.


Looking Ahead

When the end comes 
will you be able to sit with it

and keep telling yourself
it is all going to be OK? 

Are you willing to find a park bench
upon which to sit by yourself

in the last green grove on earth
and tell yourself this too shall pass?

Think about how you are trying
to make the best of this, of how

everything you’ve known till now
is coming to a point:

all existence squeezed into a dot now,
a pencil mark

on a dirty scrap of paper;
the world compressed to a period

at the end of
a sentence fragment,

and it’s harder that ever to recall
what that sentence was.

It made sense.
That’s all you know. 

It was uttered by someone
you loved, or could have loved. 

All you’ve got to go on
is one faded period and 

an illegible word
to puzzle over. Same as it has been

for most of existence: broken puzzles
are offered with great authority

and finality. No answer, no clues.
All you have to do is figure it out

and speak it for it to be real. Are you willing?
Are you ready to have this be the way it ends? 


Reprieve

When you look outside
expecting trumpets and fire
and all you hear is the drone
of photo opps legions seeking 
clicks and likes and affirmations
from the devils or angels they prefer

Peeking past the blinds
into a gray morning with no
distinguishing features beyond 
unseasonable weather and more 
humans signing on the street these days
jerking drug dances for survival

When you turn with a headshake back around
to the relative warmth of shabby rooms and rugs
and your yet to fail walls and aged thin pipes
it all doesn’t seem as bad as the trumpets
and fires you expected at this point
since you are warm and for the moment aecure

You raise a shout and toss a dance move
A wipe of the forehead and a raised glass
A song to whatever lord you think has saved you
from the trumpets and the fire and the nights in the cold
Forgetting the imminent snuffing of all candles and lanterns
You exhale in uneasy and unwarranted relief


Thank you.

Thanks to all, patrons and non-patrons, who came out to the Rip-Up Reading last night. At one point we had 29 people in the Zoom Room.

I’ll be writing up a more formal recap later today or (more likely) tomorrow. I’m exhausted still, as I usually am after doing one of these.

Until then, thank you.

Onward,
T


Last call for the Rip Up Reading.

Follow this link to the details for the Rip Up Reading. Last call. Hope some of you can attend. 

onward,
T


Three Chords And

REVISED from 10/19; originally from 2008 or so.

Once you were a chucked berry,
a fogerty full of sloppy chords,
a skip to my lou reed.

You got all slippery
with clean sauce. Turned down, tuned up, 
tossed out your faded paper bag

of dark wanderings. Bought into
commercial anthems that worked well
in the fluorescent aisles of big-box stores. 

Come back to your game desire.
Come back slaphappy, sharpened
for the war against plastic.

You used to have
a mouth full of splinters. Used to
honor dingbat and idiot,

all those
who broke the social charm
with a fart. Do you remember yourself?

Gas monster.
Blunt huffer.
Smoker of the right goddamn herbs.

You chased the scent
of acorn porridge, worked
Delta mysterious.

That devil in the crossroads
still valued
your willing ass.

You used to not be such
a freak for safety.
You used to not be

such a doom escape. Children
hate you more
now that you’re safer

and nearly devoid of a scrap
of care left
for your sulfur traditions.

We love some of you still,
even with your
crystal fraud hippie faking.

We love some of you still,
you wall street loving
gutterpunks.

It’s like watching
the fattest rats in the world
pretend they aren’t rabid.

Bite me.
Better yet?
Infect yourself.

Be the sick fuck we loved to love,
no matter how bad
you made us feel.


A Big Bowl Of Mythology

Having a big bowl of mythology
as the first act of the day
is better than taking a shower,
better than anything one can do
except for having sex and 
because the bowl of mythology
contains enough sex
to choke Dionysius or lay
Thor low, it is not as if
you can’t get that too, slurping
legends down in the kitchen
where all you have to go by
is window light. Forget the news,
forget checking e-mails until after
you are full. The old gods know
what’s good for you and they say,
fill yourself with the good news
of how we ran amok once
in our time
and still kept the world spinning.
It will give you hope and then,
your belly full, you can take on chaos
secure in the knowledge that 
given enough stories, enough examples
of randy and bloody and now and then
noble tragedy, you can get up
and be a god yourself — randomly
screwing, assuming perfect disguises,
pressing nuclear buttons
if that’s your thing; the taste of Valhalla
on your lips, the image of the Cross
throwing its redemption shadow over all.
You’ve got big shoes to fill,
a landscape to change, lightning in your belt
waiting to be hurled. It’s the breakfast of
champions: a bowl of mythology
in one of so many flavors you’ll want 
to try them all. Now
in Mixed Indigenous Berry
and East Asian Crunch!
Available for a limited time.


A Posse Of Deadly Clowns

the form I see before me
is not the true form.

do you see what I do not?
it is possible my eyes deceive me.

it would not be the first time for those little liars,
those deceitful balls playing with tricky light. 

if you say my true name I’ll change
into my true form, if the tales are to be believed,

but why should they be? the writers
have eyes which may be just as dishonest

as my own. they might have no backstory
to support the legend. so the legendary true form

may be not a true form at all but simply that
which kills the perceiver before they solve the mystery. 

never trust a writer to give you all you need 
to seize control of the world. they’re a posse of deadly clowns

riding out in search of illusions they’ll tell you are true,
and they may be right but they don’t know and won’t know

until you are staring into the mirror they’ve given you. 
they wait to see what happens.

no matter what happens,
they try again.


An Uneven Day

What an uneven day
it has been already.
Rose late and made coffee
before I showered 
because priorities
and rituals must be
honored to make things work
as they should

and now I’m sitting here 
with a pile of notes and
something that purports to be 
the start of the greatest poem
I’ve ever written and seeing that
it’s clearly on its way to being 
more crap than canon. Which
hurts more because
when it comes to all of my work
those may not be 
contradictions.

Later on someone
will call out of the blue
to say, can you
come help me move?
and inside I’ll hem and haw
but get up grudgingly and go
because I have a station wagon

and while it’s no pickup truck
priorities and rituals
must be honored.

When we’re done
one apartment will be empty
and another will be full
and I will come home
to my own that is both full
and empty at once.

Then I’ll take a second look
at the Work I left behind.
I’ll sigh and light a pipe
and after that close my eyes on the day
hoping to find myself tomorrow

back on the winding road
that leads from the bones
of one uneven day
to the next one,

where there is still
possibility
to be chased regardless
of faint chance of snatching it,
because priorities and
rituals must be observed,
even in the absence of honor.


Rip up reading: full explanation

Link to a full explanation of what’s coming up…

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=pfbid0zAipVPeUxyVoKFPz4gz3FT8BQW3qr97tkvn864AK47D95Sgp4PvxqcJFmjrDxLQal&id=734760525


That’s A Shame

Think about
all the bodies you’ve seen,
human
and otherwise.

Think beyond the human bodies
in funeral homes
or hospitals, perhaps
on battlefields or in 

car wrecks or other accidental carnage;
maybe in family homes if you grew up
in the right part of the world for folks
to die in their homes at peace or in war.

If that’s hard to grasp consider  
that you must have seen
hundreds of flies and wasps on windowsills;
chickens laid out in stores;

roadkill of all species;
the neighbor’s cat
upon a sparrow
under your feeder;

your own cat
upon a mouse
under your
kitchen table.

Have you fished?
Have you hunted?
Those are lovely shoes you are wearing —
isn’t that fine Italian leather? 

Isn’t this lovely, understanding at last
how death has surrounded you and kept you?
All life is sacred, some say.
Few of us say all death is too. It’s a shame;

we love to demonize it, saying we give
our killers the ultimate punishment
when we sentence them to the inevitable,
then sit down to a steak after the deed is done.


Rip it Up

Here’s an explanation of a special event happening next Thursday night.  If you’d like to attend via Zoom, message me. 

The Rip-Up Reading


Regrets, I Have A Slew

come so far so hard upon
the trail of where
I went once without
care for how it would look
to others 

damn it was easy
when I was young and 
all I had for care was 
residual longing
to belong

now that’s gone
to regret and guilt
but on the poor corner
I look like a king
to everyone but me

if I had a dollar for
every dollar I didn’t keep
when it was in my hand
I’d still be one broke bastard
looking for my confident used to be

with the take for granted hair
and the body that didn’t look like
this betrayal of a Creator’s fabled image 
I used to be just beautiful enough
to believe in God

and now there’s a mistake in every pore
and the distance to travel has wrinkles
and mountains and mutant caverns
I wish I could catch up to the youth I was
spin him around kiss him and say don’t be a fool

you are going to die too soon
and it’s going to be your own fault
and people are going to wail over you
and dogs are gonna fight over your bones
and this is how will be forever 

look me in the eye
and tell me
you are glad I exist
that I caught up to you 
and you are fine with having made me


The Mad King

There are very few clues to find
when exploring how
he became this narrow. 

His permanent record
barely explains anything
as no one ever felt much need

to put notes in there.
His employment file
describes his mild job history,

annual satisfactory reviews,
merely adequate
bumps in pay year upon year. 

Tax returns tell nothing
and there’s nothing of note
in the newspapers of record. 

So how he got to
hollering about the “woke mob”
that’s killing him, is a puzzle

when there’s no sign of damage
from anyone in his history. 
It all looks pretty clean.

Except for the bullshit 
on his tongue, he could be anyone.
That may be the problem: perhaps

he thought he should be exalted
for being so much like 
what he’d been told he should be

that when being ordinary and 
bland and safe-pale was not enough
by itself to make him king,

he drew a sword on his face
and stepped up and out screaming 
for his kingdom.

He makes it up
as he marches along
behind the bulls, feeding.