My Role

Understudy to the lead screw up,
bogeyman in the wings
incessantly running lines
to stay ready, so ready to go on stage
and flounder, fall, fail.

A big break is coming
for certain. Small ones
keep happening
and momentum being what it is
all that’s needed is readiness.

For now, maintaining is enough.
Getting the inflection right 
when keening, having the right gestures
to accompany stepping off a cliff
into disappearance. Practice

makes for a perfect disaster, a step by step
breakdown of breakdown. Others
who’ve done this never have the chance
to make it better so first time must be
the last time and that last time had better be

so wrong it’s just right.