When I stare into
the deep well of my
self-concern, I see only
darkness.
If I were to light
a torch and toss it in,
I’ve been told that it
would vanish in deep
shade.
I do not trust
that I’ve been
told the truth
about myself.
I will turn from myself
and my self concern.
I cannot be self-concerned
when I feel how shallow
I truly am — when I suspect
this perceived depth is in fact
just a received deception. Instead,
I will turn from my self-concern
and say enough. Enough
of this easy
gloom. There’s a wrong world
beyond me, a world that says
my self-concern is all that counts,
and it’s built of tinder and straw
and as for it being strong and
deep — no. Enough. I will give up
myself, proclaim myself
the torch,
and burn it down. I will
step back from the well that
is in fact my navel, not so deep —
I will burn myself up
and burn this selfish,
stunted world of mine
that tells me I am lord
and master
down. If others do the same
after me, I will not be here
to glory in that and I hold
neither hope nor desire for that.
All I want is to blaze enough
to set the world ablaze
with me and for there to be
nothing but new to build with
on the other side.