Tag Archives: poems

Weepy

It’s silly of me
to be weepy
when the talk show host
gives a luxury car
to a needy audience member,

really.  I know the reality —
that the car was provided
for promotional consideration,
will be hugely expensive to insure
and drive.  That the applause
for the gesture
is bait for the ratings beast.

But here I am,
weeping
at the weeping.  Happy
in a passing moment
to feel something beyond cynicism
about a good thing happening
to someone.

Don’t worry,
or do,
because this, too,
will surely pass.

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Blood In, Blood Out

draw it
from your mother
upon entering

draw it from yourself upon leaving

leave it
on an embalming table
or the floor

you cannot get in or out

without spilling some
and owning the stain
as your own doing

you think you can get away clean?

get over yourself
you’re a nest of harm
and you will come in and go out

wet

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Lower East Side, Late Summer Saturday Night

Turned onto 3rd Street
from Avenue B, which was
barely bustling at 10 PM,
walked into the club to play an early show —
came out again at midnight
and the streets were packed,
every person in the world
out on the Lower East Side,
my ears and eyes and nostrils flared
to pull it into me,
every shop open,
every bar filled,
garbage perfume underlying
the lily scent at the flower stand,
merengue blaring from a gated alley,
a column of white balloons swaying gently
in the courtyard beyond;
short skirts, long legs,
shirt tails out and two days’ growth
on every corner,
everyone seeking paths through and around each other:
the Lower East Side alive with the sound
of the turning, the churning, the shirring of wheels
as the machine that is New York City
remakes, re-imagines, revives,
and nowhere louder than in this place
that has always been
the source of beginnings,
a beehive full of promise,
sweet buzz,
and sting.

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4:59 AM, EDT, 8/29/09

I awoke and rose
61 minutes later
thinking I’d just looked at the clock
a minute before.  I must have
spent a minute
thinking about why I was awake,
then fallen back to sleep.

It’s as if I stopped
for a whole hour.
Only the memory
of having seen the time
tells me I’d existed then
in a time before
this groggy chain-smoking moment on the couch
in front of a screen waiting to be filled
with proof that I do maintain a presence
during the moments
when I am unconscious.

It is 7:15 AM, EDT, 8/29/09.
All hail 4:59 AM, EDT, 8/29/09.

It was raining then, as it is now;
I was hungry then, as I am now;
the urge to rise and work and smoke
were all the same back then.
Nothing’s changed except the time,
the light in the windows,
and this documentation.

If I go back to bed now,
(and I will)
will I even wake up
again?  If I do, won’t my first thought
likely be the memory of this moment?

How, exactly, does the future ever arrive?

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Pet Rocks

he’s getting down to work this morning
but daydreaming about
Pet Rocks

how some guy made
a million bucks
selling rocks
in cardboard boxes
with a little straw
and an owner’s manual inside

how they sold out

and how some people refused
to buy them and just picked up
rocks where they were
and put them in boxes
and called them pet rocks
and others sold knockoffs
that had little googly eyes
hot glued to them and those
sold well too

but the point was
everyone had a pet rock
and called them pet rocks
and cared for their pet rocks
and they were all just rocks
but more than one person
got rich anyway

he’s thinking about Pet Rocks
while folding the T-shirts
on his kitchen table
packing them in boxes
shipping them out
never even bothering to read
the slogans of the minute
that he silkscreened on the shirts
last night after midnight

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The Sand-Filled Boy

The sand-filled boy
became bottom-heavy,
his past running through him,
holding him down.
Always so worried about time
running out
that he never learned to turn
somersaults
and reverse the process.

When they buried him, of course,
he found an equilibrium. 
If he had been able to care,
he might have been happy with that.

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Dark Chocolate

this fading night
has been
dark chocolate
biting softly back
at my happy tongue

but dawn is coming soon
and with it will come the moment
when I will
bite down
to learn whether what I’ve chosen
measures up

my fear is not
that I will be disappointed
but
that I may not be
utterly delighted
that I will have imagined
more than I can chew

and that by dismissing
the good
because it is not
perfection

I will forget the sweet stab
of dark chocolate
that has enthralled me
thus far

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New Duende Tracks up!

Three tracks up, two for immediate download this week only: “By The Numbers,” a tender tale of a school shooting with great bass work by Faro; and perennial favorite “The Last Word,” aka “Let’s Fuck.”

Our first album, “Jim’s Fall,” included a 17 minute track of the title suite of poems. We’ve re-recorded it from scratch and will be re-releasing it as an EP of sorts all on its own, now broken out with each poem being its own separate track. My favorite track from that effort, “Jim Loses His Grip,” which is a staple of our live shows, is also up for your listening pleasure although not for download…sorry guys…

Keep watching this space for more info…and visit the “Show Schedule” tab above for access to the tracks and info about where we’ll be…for instance, I’ll be in NYC this Saturday for a solo show at the Nuyorican Poets’ Cafe.  Love to see you there.

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Saturday Morning

The ragged hair of the unkempt lawn
offers a mixed message:

cut me, restore order;
let me grow, keep a wildness in the city.

I imagine all the possibilities:
then, with a sigh,

pull the mower from the shed
and begin to hold my small place in the world.

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Political Climate

The leftist
was all about summer,
enjoyed the humidity
and the heat.  It made the people
dissatisfied, reminded them of the cost
of air conditioning, unsafe city pools
made less safe by the absence of lifeguards
due to budget cuts, and the way the police
stared suspiciously at small knots
of young brown men on corners. 

The conservative looked forward
to winter.  The cold kept the people
close to home, the snow
piled up in dirty ridges
like border walls, the rough and narrow streets
made rougher and narrower, and everyone
eyeing their parking spaces in paranoia,
guarding their spots with rickety chairs,
boxes, and entitlement for having gone out
and dug them themselves.

A few always said:
Give me fall.  Give me
the riot in the trees, the flames
along the branches.  Give me the dying
and the sidewalks full of debris,
the sense of things failing before they can be
reborn. 

And the whole while the rest of us,
the unlabeled people,
thought all year round about spring
and its fertile mud, how early snaps
of warmth would bring hope of temperance,
how the green would hover unseen in the buds
and bulbs not yet awake, then
would in one day transform
the world when we weren’t looking
to something perfectly suited to our needs.

Somewhere, of course,
was an old woman who chattered incessantly
to herself about cycles
while sitting at her window as she had
for years

but no one wants to hear that,
whatever the weather…

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A Door In Paradise

In every Paradise —
and there are many,
despite what you’ve been told —
there is a weathered door
or shabby gate
for letting in the things
that are alleged to be anathema
to Paradise. 

It’s no mistake or oversight.
It’s part of the plan to make things
perfect there.
It’s not a Paradise unless
it takes into account
that human need for
energy expended against
threat, and
also offers comfort
for those residents who are not happy
unless some taint of the Other
is possible. 

The existence of the door
is known to all,

and in the gambling dens of Paradise
there is always action, heavy action,
on the exact moment when the hinges
will creak.  Breathless with anticipation,
the happiest people in the universe

always hover silently
around the monitors,
hoping for that sound.

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Where I’ll be reading…

I’ll be doing two shows in the next two weeks — both solo features, without Faro.

Friday 8/21 at the More Than Words Bookstore in Waltham;

Saturday 8/29 at the Nuyorican Poets’ Cafe in NYC as part of the Verses Series.

Click on the Show Schedule tab above, go to Reverbnation, and then hit the “Shows” tab, for details.

Would love to see you there…


Dad’s Close Order Drill

The five purposes of close order drill are to:

1. Provide simple formation from which various combat formations could readily be assumed.

Look for their fear.
Slip your hand into it, make it
your puppet,
pull it close,
make it rigid,
make it dance.

The dinner table provides
the ideal environment for this.

2. Move units from one place to another in a standard and orderly manner, while maintaining the best possible appearance.

Speak to them
with great attention
to their faults.  Do not fail
to hit the same notes again and again:
inadequacy, failure, shame at heritage
denied and betrayed…and ensure
that nothing of the conversation
will be heard outside that room.

3. Provide the troops an opportunity to handle individual weapons.

If you are focused
soon enough the words
will come from them,
tailored, well-pressed,

4. Instill discipline through precision and automatic response to orders.

and when they cringe
you won’t even have to watch
to know it’s happening.

5.  Increase a leader’s confidence through the exercise of command by giving
proper commands and drilling troops.

Won’t you accept the salute,
the hands above their eyes,
shading themselves from the heat?
You have earned it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

* close order drill objectives, in italics, taken from USMC Website

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To Be A Sunflower

Make up a word to describe
a sunflower’s turning toward the sun —
you’ll have to stand between flower and sun
with the sun at your back to do so.

You’ll tell me, then, that you can stand
to one side to watch, and that’s true:
but how will you know what it feels like
to be a sunflower if you do?

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Travis Benson

webcams will tonight be streaming
live images from inside the mind
of one travis benson, who has managed
to insert one in each ear and tune them
to a frequency of light he has determined
will allow the visual display of his thoughts.

before today, travis was a virtual unknown
who labored in a basement in some undetermined city
to bring his vision to fruition.  only a handful
of esoterically inclined and fully wired aficionados
of the fuzzier edges of experimentation
have been aware of his work, as well as

certain governments who have sought him for some time.
in gray buildings on the outskirts of capitals worldwide
hired geeks stand ready to track him down when he comes on line,
as their masters imagine a future bonanza for intelligence work
if the technique works as rumored.  the possibilities,
it is thought, will be endless: the passive voice of a spy’s mind
revealing all the intricacies of espionage, the names and places
of deadly deceits and plotted assassinations…at the same time,

artists have waited eagerly for this moment, hoping that tonight they’ll see
the threads of creativity exposed in the bright storm anticipated
in travis’ skull.  what will be discovered in the crannies
of the genius who created this moment, a moment only ever before captured
in the illusory fragments of thought that until now have been deemed
masterpieces — the sistine chapel, the hulks of giant buddhas carved
into mountains, strains of gamelan and symphony, the words of writers
imperfectly reflecting what they were thinking?

at 2315 GMT, travis benson’s mind goes online
and screens go dark all over the world.

at first, the images are confusing:  a forest of eyes.
a field of small birds feeding on germs.  a city
where the streets are paved with chlldren’s bones.
an immense fall of leaden water salted with the hearts of mice.

as the viewers — millions of them, billions perhaps,
all focused on one travis benson — begin to sort through
what they are seeing, the images on the screen begin to shift
into a story of disjoint and ripple, unremediated rejections
and leftover resentments.  in india, there are those who swear
they see kali charming them; american racists see nothing but black teeth
gnawing the arms of white women; a businessman in caracas
imagines himself in the grip of apes with scimitars.  the pope,
secretly hoping for some proof of the divine, is startled
when jesus appears waving a wedding ring.  a child in new york city
runs screaming to her mother demanding that new doll, the one
that dreams and beats and frets.

around the world, the people slowly reach in zombie time
for the switches.  they go outside and stare up at the stars,
holding each other, talking of love, of family, anything
to erase what they’ve seen.

the artists turn back
to their canvases and keyboards,
painting and playing
hymns and wedding marches,
landscapes and erotic joy.

what the governments think
is classified.

and as for travis benson: what else can be said?
no one wants to know him anymore,
this ugly man who has done an ugly thing.

he disconnects
the cameras.  he goes outside.
in the ensuing days
he will heal himself,
staring anonymously at the things
he’s wrought.

memory,
travis thinks, is a creature
of habit.  it feeds in the same places
unless something changes…
and something has changed.
a frequency of light.
of lightness.

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