Healing

there are days when healing feels like sleep
its attendant feelings slow me down 
to a point where instead of standing and walking
I seep from place to place like viscous fluid
I cover the floor but do not evaporate

and other days when healing feels like bouncing
from wall to ceiling and back and the windows
from outside are filthy and from inside
they aren’t much better but I can’t stop bouncing
and it would be hilarious if every strike didn’t bruise me

but there are more and more days of healing through skill building
days when instead of bouncing or seeping I am training my hands
to cradle bullets and stop itching while on a trigger 
because to heal is in part to eradicate causes and vectors
and there are people in charge who need to be healed