Author Archives: Tony Brown

About Tony Brown

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A poet with a history in slam, lots of publications; my personal poetry and a little bit of daily life and opinions. Read the page called "About..." for the details.

Worcester Slam finals

are tonight…

I’ve been so busy in the apartment (and I can now officially say I’m completely in here) that I’ve had no time to practice or indeed, prep effectively.

I’ve got new stuff, but am thinking I might go with some older stuff I don’t slam with in addition to adding in a new piece.

Then again, I want to make the team, so it might be a tried and true night. I think I proved myself adequately in the semis in terms of slamming with new stuff, so I might go with the legacy stuff instead.

I’ve burned “Punk,” “SoaP” and “Mission Statement” already, so those are off the table in terms of the oldest stuff…thank God.

We’ll see…

Good luck to everyone — bring it like it’s the last time we’ll ever do this.


Hey!

I think I found the Holy Grail at a yard sale.

I bargained them down to 1.50 from 3.00 by agreeing to purchase the Ark Of The Covenant for 40.00, too.

I really need a refrigerator, though. Anyone want to trade? I will tell you that the Ark hums continuously, so if you need quiet, this one’s not for you.


Primrose Lane — second draft

the unappealing character
smokes as he walks away
from the wasted son he’s brought here;
he saunters off to start a new life.

i can be anything now,
he tells himself. he pats his chest
to be sure he has enough cigarettes
for the journey.

meanwhile, the boy assembles his tools.
what will he be when he adjusts
to the scentless air?
he tells himself it doesn’t matter,

that this is his father’s life and he needn’t
live it if he doesn’t understand it,
but he knows he’s going to try.
he knows he’s honor-bound to it.

the smoking man is long gone
when the boy sits down on the curb and imagines
the smell of marlboros on the breeze.
it’ll be dark a long time. it’ll be good to have a compass like that.


Arrogance

Turn away from it all —
the television, the race, the war,
the idiocy of leaders, the sweetness
of sex, the blue gloss of the false tongue.

Decide that only you know what to do next.

Take a gun to the walls of the city,
or climb a tower to spot your target with a razor in your teeth.
Staighten your hair and remember your true name,
the one that you were given at birth
by the grandmother you never knew, the one
whispered to you when you were five hours old.

Stare down at the people, the ants and ant-cars, booths
of shopping mothers, arguing merchants, cash tendered
for tender moments, small gifts bought on impulse
to soothe tension among children.

If there’s an instance of death you can feel —
recalling the wake where a body no longer
heated the air around it, the smiles of the unfamiliar
relatives — hold that moment close. Pretend it’s happening
all over again, right now.

Steel yourself. Draw a bead
on the underlife.

Isn’t this enough? The knowledge of
what you think is in your power?
Your urge to kill and drop yourself
after the killing, the desire to fall
all burning and thunderbolt upon the masses —
why? No one will care tomorrow
that you were the angel of justice.
They’ll call you crazy and revile you.
All that down below is what you are, too;
they think of this moment on the tower
from time to time themselves, you know.
Everyone wants to play God. Witness
the television’s frantic screeching, the racial jockeying,
the war begun and ended,
the sex coerced or desired,
the children conceived and abandoned.
Offer a person ten minutes to talk
and they’ll fix the world for you. Offer ten dollars
to a homeless man and watch how both of you
stand a little taller, feel a little better than the other guy.

Nothing you do here makes you better than the other guy.

When you give up the fantasy, toss the gun
over the wall, drop the razor into the AC duct,
and come down, you’re not changed.
They still seem like ants, but so much larger,
and those extra legs you seem to have grown
are just a measure of how strong you think you are.


Self-Awareness

For a guy who’s fairly sensitive about the feelings of others, I rarely take that into account when I disagree with them.

I’m far more of a jerk than I admit to being.

EDIT: This has nothing to do with the Falwell posts.


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There are times when the intolerance of the left for differing viewpoints is more disgusting to me than that of the right.

I’ve always thought that the hate of the right for human diversity is as motivated by fear as it is by anything else — fear of change and the inexorable march of progress.

It seems to me that sometimes, the hatred of the left for the right is mostly motivated by arrogance. I don’t know which is worse, but I’m not sure it matters.

Let Jerry Falwell be. He’s gone; I’m glad. But wishing retribution upon him in the afterlife seems foul. What (if anything) will be will be.


Serious thoughts on Falwell’s death…

Big news: an overweight 73 year old man has died of heart failure.

What’s the surprise? Where’s the reason to either celebrate or mourn, if you didn’t know the man personally? Looks like nature taking its course to me. I wish people would stop gloating.

His ideals and methods will live on, of course. Focus on that if you want his death to spur you to some kind of emotional reaction, and then take action upon it.

If you believe his death means something or led to a post-mortem punishment for his life and actions, I would suggest that you’re pretty much right in line with a lot of how Falwell himself operated.


Jerry Falwell dies

The CNN caption I just saw read, “Falwell Found Unresponsive In His Office.”

But how did they know he was dead?


a sleeping pill that doesn’t really work

but just makes you groggy when you do come awake for no reason…

not so good.

and I’m not taking another one, so I guess I’ll just bull my way through it.

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if i knew anything about videogames i’d write a poem about them.

are there any videogames that incorporate random chance? i’m under the impression that for the most part, playing a video game is about mastering the various options that come when one makes choices.

but it seems to me that those potentials are already there, waiting to be discovered — and once they’re discovered they’re discovered. they were static all along — no true chance there. is that correct?

i think that’s why i always preferred pinball.

are there videogames that offer the chance of a random bounce?

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robot chicken is on. i like this show inordinately.

prior to this, I watched an episode of “futurama” that included a version of “tv party” by black flag. this also pleased me inordinately.

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it’s official: i need to try to go back to sleep. even though ATHF is on now.


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it’s hard not to love a poetry reading

that includes a 5 year old doing “The Message” in the open.


TRASH TALK

I placed second in the Worcester Semis tonight.

Bill MacMillan beat me for first place. He sees fit to crow about this in his LJ.

I would like to point out that I made second place:

— after going second in round 1 and drawing a 2.5 point time penalty that left me in seventh place;
— using three out of four poems I’d never performed before, let alone slammed with.

Personally, I feel pretty good. But hey, if it makes him feel better…


Good luck to all

in Semis tonight.

Let’s have fun. I know I’m going to.

😉