An old show about an old story.
You know who wrote it.
You say you’ve never seen it?
That’s because you’re in it.
It’s been the same basic plot
from the start: eventually everyone
becomes either silent, dead,
or Ward and June.
Beaver and Wally? As long as they sell,
sell, sell and buy, buy, buy, it’s all good.
A hard hat for Lumpy. For Eddie Haskell?
A badge and a gun.
Except for June, they don’t need
named or memorable women, and as for
everyone else unseen it’s already
been discussed –silent, or dead.
You say you want to change the channel?
June looks worried. Ward puts down his pipe
and takes off his belt. Wally makes himself
scarce, Beaver waits in his room. Eddie grins,
and nobody gives a fuck about Lumpy.