There was once a man who was swallowed
by a mole on his own chest.
He shrank and was drawn in until
he vanished in the blood delta it had grown
to survive. No one heard a word from him for many months.
When he returned, his friends came and identified him
and he recalled them at once, but found himself
unable to respond to their questions.
Inside, the man knew he was still missing.
Cancer is not a country you come back from easily,
he tried to explain, and they soothed and patted him until
he was nearly sick again.
Spring’s a mistake, he thought.
It’s wasted on the ones
with easy lives. I want the green for myself,
all for myself.
It’s a myth that suffering always makes us noble.
It’s a myth that suffering makes us love more deeply.
There’s only one truth in suffering: that it hurts,
and that we disappear into it and we can’t entirely explain
what it meant to be there, and what it meant to come out.
He dreams of his red jungle most nights, and many days.
Every dark spot on his skin looks like a river’s mouth,
a point of fear to be wary of.
He is wary of them all. He is wary of re-entry.
But there are times he almost wants to go back —
back where he lived by hunting for the exit,
swimming for days awash in panic,
but fierce and alive because he knew then what he wanted:
the green for myself, all for myself,
and now he has to share it, and he doesn’t know how.
Dark Matter 
February 21st, 2005 at 6:04 pm
I recall that. I’m sorry.
This one was inspired by a relative of mine, since deceased of unrelated causes, whose fight back from cancer was successful but which left her embittered and angry. She just seemed unable to talk to anyone with any degree of comfort ever again. I think it contributed to the heart attack that killed her.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:04 pm
I recall that. I’m sorry.
This one was inspired by a relative of mine, since deceased of unrelated causes, whose fight back from cancer was successful but which left her embittered and angry. She just seemed unable to talk to anyone with any degree of comfort ever again. I think it contributed to the heart attack that killed her.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:04 pm
I recall that. I’m sorry.
This one was inspired by a relative of mine, since deceased of unrelated causes, whose fight back from cancer was successful but which left her embittered and angry. She just seemed unable to talk to anyone with any degree of comfort ever again. I think it contributed to the heart attack that killed her.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:04 pm
I recall that. I’m sorry.
This one was inspired by a relative of mine, since deceased of unrelated causes, whose fight back from cancer was successful but which left her embittered and angry. She just seemed unable to talk to anyone with any degree of comfort ever again. I think it contributed to the heart attack that killed her.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:04 pm
I recall that. I’m sorry.
This one was inspired by a relative of mine, since deceased of unrelated causes, whose fight back from cancer was successful but which left her embittered and angry. She just seemed unable to talk to anyone with any degree of comfort ever again. I think it contributed to the heart attack that killed her.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:04 pm
I recall that. I’m sorry.
This one was inspired by a relative of mine, since deceased of unrelated causes, whose fight back from cancer was successful but which left her embittered and angry. She just seemed unable to talk to anyone with any degree of comfort ever again. I think it contributed to the heart attack that killed her.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:04 pm
I recall that. I’m sorry.
This one was inspired by a relative of mine, since deceased of unrelated causes, whose fight back from cancer was successful but which left her embittered and angry. She just seemed unable to talk to anyone with any degree of comfort ever again. I think it contributed to the heart attack that killed her.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:52 pm
I really admire the control you have over your language and imagery that allows you to get at the meat of what you are saying without stumbling all over yourself (or getting distracted along the way).
That line, especially, struck me because as we drove to Nashville to see my grandmother who was dying of skin cancer (metasticized to lung) I kept seeing these billboards for a cancer hospital with pithy sayings like, “Because I want to see my grandkids grow up.” Everytime I saw one I wanted to gnaw on the dashboard.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:52 pm
I really admire the control you have over your language and imagery that allows you to get at the meat of what you are saying without stumbling all over yourself (or getting distracted along the way).
That line, especially, struck me because as we drove to Nashville to see my grandmother who was dying of skin cancer (metasticized to lung) I kept seeing these billboards for a cancer hospital with pithy sayings like, “Because I want to see my grandkids grow up.” Everytime I saw one I wanted to gnaw on the dashboard.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:52 pm
I really admire the control you have over your language and imagery that allows you to get at the meat of what you are saying without stumbling all over yourself (or getting distracted along the way).
That line, especially, struck me because as we drove to Nashville to see my grandmother who was dying of skin cancer (metasticized to lung) I kept seeing these billboards for a cancer hospital with pithy sayings like, “Because I want to see my grandkids grow up.” Everytime I saw one I wanted to gnaw on the dashboard.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:52 pm
I really admire the control you have over your language and imagery that allows you to get at the meat of what you are saying without stumbling all over yourself (or getting distracted along the way).
That line, especially, struck me because as we drove to Nashville to see my grandmother who was dying of skin cancer (metasticized to lung) I kept seeing these billboards for a cancer hospital with pithy sayings like, “Because I want to see my grandkids grow up.” Everytime I saw one I wanted to gnaw on the dashboard.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:52 pm
I really admire the control you have over your language and imagery that allows you to get at the meat of what you are saying without stumbling all over yourself (or getting distracted along the way).
That line, especially, struck me because as we drove to Nashville to see my grandmother who was dying of skin cancer (metasticized to lung) I kept seeing these billboards for a cancer hospital with pithy sayings like, “Because I want to see my grandkids grow up.” Everytime I saw one I wanted to gnaw on the dashboard.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:52 pm
I really admire the control you have over your language and imagery that allows you to get at the meat of what you are saying without stumbling all over yourself (or getting distracted along the way).
That line, especially, struck me because as we drove to Nashville to see my grandmother who was dying of skin cancer (metasticized to lung) I kept seeing these billboards for a cancer hospital with pithy sayings like, “Because I want to see my grandkids grow up.” Everytime I saw one I wanted to gnaw on the dashboard.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:52 pm
I really admire the control you have over your language and imagery that allows you to get at the meat of what you are saying without stumbling all over yourself (or getting distracted along the way).
That line, especially, struck me because as we drove to Nashville to see my grandmother who was dying of skin cancer (metasticized to lung) I kept seeing these billboards for a cancer hospital with pithy sayings like, “Because I want to see my grandkids grow up.” Everytime I saw one I wanted to gnaw on the dashboard.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:43 pm
Yes. It is true, isn’t it…nothing like a fight for survival to make you know what it means to be alive.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:43 pm
Yes. It is true, isn’t it…nothing like a fight for survival to make you know what it means to be alive.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:43 pm
Yes. It is true, isn’t it…nothing like a fight for survival to make you know what it means to be alive.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:43 pm
Yes. It is true, isn’t it…nothing like a fight for survival to make you know what it means to be alive.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:43 pm
Yes. It is true, isn’t it…nothing like a fight for survival to make you know what it means to be alive.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:43 pm
Yes. It is true, isn’t it…nothing like a fight for survival to make you know what it means to be alive.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:43 pm
Yes. It is true, isn’t it…nothing like a fight for survival to make you know what it means to be alive.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:42 pm
“but fierce and alive because he knew then what he wanted”
Yes.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:42 pm
“but fierce and alive because he knew then what he wanted”
Yes.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:42 pm
“but fierce and alive because he knew then what he wanted”
Yes.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:42 pm
“but fierce and alive because he knew then what he wanted”
Yes.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:42 pm
“but fierce and alive because he knew then what he wanted”
Yes.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:42 pm
“but fierce and alive because he knew then what he wanted”
Yes.
February 21st, 2005 at 5:42 pm
“but fierce and alive because he knew then what he wanted”
Yes.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:25 am
That is very nice! 😉
Thanks.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:25 am
That is very nice! 😉
Thanks.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:25 am
That is very nice! 😉
Thanks.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:25 am
That is very nice! 😉
Thanks.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:25 am
That is very nice! 😉
Thanks.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:25 am
That is very nice! 😉
Thanks.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:25 am
That is very nice! 😉
Thanks.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:19 am
This is very good.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:19 am
This is very good.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:19 am
This is very good.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:19 am
This is very good.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:19 am
This is very good.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:19 am
This is very good.
February 21st, 2005 at 6:19 am
This is very good.