Author Archives: Tony Brown

About Tony Brown

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A poet with a history in slam, lots of publications; my personal poetry and a little bit of daily life and opinions. Read the page called "About..." for the details.

Black Arts

traveling
via black arts,
relying on

scraps
of spells
on small pages
in small notebooks
for my tickets
and transfers.

here we see
a spell to change
venue, here is one
to open tariffs,
here’s one
to spread plastic.

on the rails
toward
semblance of
goal and
peace,
carried on
evil’s dark back,
doing wicked things
for good reason.

traveling, living in fact
by black arts.
i’m as good as any
other american,
as bad, as 
speedbound.

 


Owls

At the Oak Room, at
the local function hall,
at the VFW, at the Dive Bar
named “The Dive Bar,” at
the church cookout, at
the corner store, at night
lying scared in bent beds and
drunk on rotten couches,

the people are hearing owls,

and always, someone present
recalls a myth that hearing owls
three nights in a row
portends the listener’s death…

what does it mean,
says the tribe,
that lately we all hear it
every night, no matter
where we are?

Maybe it means
we’re all going to die,
says one joker.  But such a thing
is absurd, so they
laugh and drink and watch
the darkness under the trees.

The owls know the truth.
It’s not just any owl
who carries bad news;
it’s one owl, a tired and rumpled
sage who’s been at this
a long time.  But they keep that
to themselves, let the myth
live on — it’s money
and protection and status
under their wings.  
When the right owl comes through
on his mission, they step back
and clam up while he works.  

So last night, when 
the mechanic heard that call
upon leaving the bar, third night
in a row, he heard one voice
speaking, and he knew

and so did not take the necessary
evasive maneuvers,
crashed around the tree,
and died at peace…
and everyone whispered
the next day that 
some old myths
must be true.  
And all the owls
were well satisfied,

as were the people
in their drunken beds,
on their rotten couches,
in their bars, at their cookouts,

at the VFW halls
full of men who knew something
of death, and of how it comes
unheralded mostly,
and who welcomed a change
from that.

 


The Law

A brook carves its way
by two methods:
flowing down,
never ceasing.
That’s the Law, the only Law.

You say no,
stop and regroup. Plan,
or let the path suggest itself
first.  The path springs eternal —
that’s the Law, the ony Law:

tap the spring first, then dig the channel.
You will tell the brook
how to flow, what
works, what’s tested, say 
that’s the Law, the only Law.

But there’s that brook.
Can’t argue with results —
it’s got banks to roll through.
You love to sit by its banks.
That’s the Law, the only Law.

You dig, it cuts.  You make it happen,
it allows it to happen.  You surge,
dawdle, surge;  it just keeps
going, is always a brook even as it changes.
That’s the Law, the only Law.

The Law says what’s right for a brook
isn’t right for you, or for you, or perhaps
for anyone who’s not a brook.  If the brook
carves, why do you care how it carves
if it follows the Law, the only Law,

the Law that says downhill
draws out the flow, that constancy
gets things done, that the intention
is found in the flow?
That’s the Law, the only Law.

 


Flowering Of Dissent

stop rejecting
the flowering of dissent
in your mouth
if you are critical
criticize
don’t let Pollyanna
“if you can’t say something nice
say nothing”
rule your teeth or
break your bite
express what is real
if it is bitter
better that
than swallowing
the disturbance

my own mouth having been
a nettle patch for years
I know how it hurts
to hold thorns inside
they were meant to sting others
so let them sting

someone’s going to tell you
I suck for speaking of this
in truth
I do suck
blood from wounds
but only to stay alive
and know how 
blood tastes so I
may know my own flavor
in the juice of another

if you’re made for this
evolution is at play
deny the species your adaptation
and it dies a little
who are you to judge
the cosmos
if something pains you
offends
kills
call it painful offensive
killer

call it dumb if it’s dumb
oversmart if it’s oversmart

call it out
and see it in sunlight
twitching
you’ll be hated for it
but that’s 
your job

 


Nothing Is Happening (And I Feel Fine)

Nothing is happening,
thank God.  Stasis
rules for once.  That lawnmower
has finally stopped chucking rocks
and now it’s all
hands thrown up and
“so what?” outside. 
Maybe God got hurt
and the Zeitgeist is holding its breath
until the outcome is known.  
It works for me; truthfully, I don’t even care.
Suffice it to say
if we’ve all become set in acrylic
and this is how it’s going to be
from now on, I’m ready
to suspend indefinitely
my need to be
entertained, excited
and creative.  I’ll sit
with this bemused face
till time ends
if that’s what’s required 
in the new world,
if you can call this still-life
a new world, or a world at all —

ah, hell,
the air conditioner 
just kicked on, and
the buzz seems to have
started things up again.
I was so happy there for a moment
and now, I suppose
I’ll have to finish this poem
and maybe do dishes
or pay a bill if that’s
really necessary. 


Packaging

I am
packaging.  I was
all the wrapping
my Inside needed,
and now that it’s gone,
I’m trash.  

If you pick me
up I’ll mutely honor you
for putting me in 
a proper receptacle — either
a recycling bin or
a garbage can.
Your decision
will be
the right one; no matter
which one you pick
I’ll lie inside it 
shiny and empty
until the time comes
for me to move on,
perhaps to recycling
and flame and reshaping,
perhaps to burial 
in dark, polluted earth.

Either way, you’ll have made
the right choice  —
for I was made 
only to contain
and not to have my own path.

I live, and have lived always
in the service
of another,
and see no reason
to stop now. 

 


Old Lion

The old cat,
once fussy and obstinate,
became meek and weak
in his last days —

but somehow, after a lifetime
of clumsy moth kills,
slew two mice in two weeks —
his first ever.

Laying him to rest,
sobbing as I think of
small bodies lying limp
between his paws

as he stared at me
with clear surprise
at what he’d managed
to do, with what looked like

pride mingled into his confusion —
I sob and smile at the lion
he at last conjured from inside
his once-fat, thinned-out frame. 

RIP, Icchus.  1998-2011.

Icchus in guitar case, 2010. 


For Joey

A big blue cheer goes up
over the town when they find
the body of Joey the town drunk
lying on the common at dawn.

“We always knew
it’d end this way,” they hoot.
It’s always grim around here,
so everyone laughs

over such a public death.
They don’t happen often —
the kid cut apart on the North End tracks,
the frozen corpse uncovered

after the snows finally melt.
This one’s no less funny
for having been
so long anticipated.

No more, then, the lopsided mouth
and the ever present crusted briar pipe.
No more the mumbled nosiness
if you were out on the street

too late for his sensibilities.
“Where you going? Too young
for this late, too young,”
and he’d brandish a bottle

of ginger brandy in admonishment.  Irony
was unknown when we were kids
and we’d stay away until we knew
how easy he was to tweak

into incoherent anger.
How easy it was to steal that bottle
and toss it into the bushes
behind the library, and run.

When the word spread that he’d died
sleeping rough, we felt a twinge
of guilt that passed.  The town
wouldn’t be the same without him;

we bent then our seemingly immortal selves
to the task of replacing him.
How could we continue to live here
if there was no unfortunate to jeer,

if there was no Joey to laugh at?
We stared at each other as we passed
the bag, the joint, the mirror,
visualizing briar pipes in each other’s mouths,

wondering to whom
would fall the honor
of being
the butt of the traditional joke.


For The Ghost Dancers

An owl at rest.

Among its feathers,
the silence of pre-Conquest
America.

In its flight,
strategic retreat;
in its call,
a charge — 

remember,
the coyotes
in the Worcester hills
once were only found across
the Mississippi,

and now
they are
everywhere.

 


-Ism Explained

Regarding this proverbial
Elephant In The Room:

there’s an Elephant in this room,
one in every room in fact,
and more than a few outside.

If you’re looking out the window
and you see an Elephant,
you say, “Hey! An Elephant!
Man, I’m glad there’s not one
in here!  I’d better not
go outside!”

You won’t see
The Elephant In Your Room
because you’re so busy watching
the one outside
for fear of it getting in.

If you do turn around
and see
The Elephant In The Room,

you’ll say,
“Hey!  An Elephant!
How’d that get in here?
What the fuck am I supposed
to do now?”

And you’ll sit very still
hoping the Elephant
doesn’t see you.

Unless, of course,
you’re inside
The Elephant,
in which case
you see nothing
at all, and don’t even know
it’s an Elephant.

Or, of course,
you could be
riding the Elephant:
directing it, training it
to be omnipresent,
invisible, rank
and ancient,
quiet and looming over
everyone, a utilitarian
threat
to break out
and mess
with everyone’s shit
big time,
all the time fully aware
that it doesn’t even need
to go rogue
to tear shit up,

and either way,
you’ll still be on top.


Buck Up

If you don’t do
what you’re told
as a matter of course,

if you know you heard
the antithesis come out of their mouths
a minute ago,

if you see where
their cards are hidden,
come sit by me.

If saying the right thing
is hemlock on your lips
when the wrong thing is true,

if they’re naked
but pretending to preen
their vaporwear,

if you know the gutpunch
of being self-destructively aware,
come sit by me.

Been there, done that,
bought the hairshirt.
I’ve seen the palms of too many hands

turned toward me, used to rage
at that,  finally said:
someone needs to do this,

it might as well be me
and the few I find
with the stomach for the blow.

We don’t live happy, we don’t
live well or long, but we live
stung and awake all the time.

There’s not much room
on this hard little bench I’ve made,
but it’s got a killer view.

There’s not much to drink
but water and nothing to eat
but hard bread; ah, well.

So if the ones you love most
offend you the most with this crap
because you thought they knew better,

if they spit and kick at you
and call you spare dog, old junk,
ripper of social fabric,

if you look at your hands all day
and wonder why they’re empty
and no one is shaking them anymore,

if you can see clear across the river
to the hallows on the other side
and know that no boat is gonna come for you

with balloons and ponies and a banner
saying “WE MISSED YOU,” and no band
will be playing when you get to the dock,

if you know all this and also know
that nothing’s able to still your disbelief
in the things that are not true,

or your anger at those
who would blind Mercy for others
to save their own righteousness

(even as you have from time to time,
you admit that, you know
you’re as bad as the rest

but you at least take a beat
to consider that before digging
into such tender eyes), if

you are alone right now
and ready to sink from it,
come sit by me.


Coming To America (Cryptids)

we saw an upright creature
that did not seem to be a bear

we saw the coils of a serpent
rising, falling on the surface
of the lake

we saw an animal
on two legs
with great wings

we saw an owl
the size of a man
dressed in a business suit

we saw
other upright creatures
with great fortunes
walking among us
as if they were familiar
with how we lived

we saw a yeti
in a cafe
speaking well of Noam Chomsky
while drinking fair trade coffee

we saw money we were owed
in the paws of chupacabras

we saw the Mendes goat
playing dominoes

we saw an equation
that measured Nessie
covering a chalkboard
while a posse of swamp apes
debated its nature

we saw compassionate
border patrols of mothmen
floating over the Rio Grande

we knew these were the legends of old
the monsters of the imagination

we saw in the margins of old maps
the words “here be dragons”
and recognized our surroundings
at once


Keeping Chicken

dirty man
dark as this old house
with a chicken coop tumbled
down back

musty fellow
grime and shabby thought
big round hands
bald eyed and wanting
a shave
a pill
a clean mind
first stoop bound
then through the thin door

if i can get a home
i can get a job
if i can get a job
i can keep a house
if i can keep a house
i can keep chickens
then chickens
will keep me

shard of a man
now in the coop

the small curled feathers
on the gray floor
like shavings from a plane

they made some things here
i could too

squat man
spreads blanket

if i can stay here
i can stay here
if i can stay here
i can stay here
can stay here
if i can
if i can maybe
be home
with chickens
to keep me
keep me
keep a home

 


The Immortality Project Hits A Snag

I’m not planning on dying
yet — indeed, at all, if I
can help it.  I plan to
cast myself in hollow resin,
build robotic pumps and filters
for the insides,
and stay hooked into the grid
in lieu of having a brain,
memories, human
connection.

I can exist, I think,
without eyes for new beauty
and ears for novel sounds —
I’ve seen and heard quite enough,
thank you.  Food’s
a distraction and a crutch,
so here’s an unregretted good bye
to taste, and 
what my skin has taught me
has been mostly treacherous.

But, oh, the nose —

I don’t know how to 
lose that forever;
I don’t know
how to live
without these scents
that drag up specifics,
that cause recoil and 
draw me into events
and people I would not 
have otherwise known:

a red onion left too long on a plate.
The vague odor of the trash.
The neck after swimming.
The firepit next door.

How shall I set myself free
of these
without knowing the ends
of the stories?

 


Sentencing

when they say the child is missing
do you at once know who to blame.

do you know guilt when you see it.  
do you know its color.  
do you remember its voice.

when the child is found dead do you think first of the smell.  
are you sickened.  

do you listen when they call the suspect’s name.  
do you mistake it for your own.  
for a name you know.

do you thirst then for justice or for punishment.

do you loathe the blindfold on justice.  
do you long to pull it off.  
do you see it as askew.
would you be willing to pull it off to feel better. 

if the word “guilty” is uttered do you feel warm.  
snuggly as dog in bed warm.  
cozy at home.

if the words “not guilty” are uttered are you unsatisfied.  
do you feel more unemployed.  
do you feel more broke.

do you imagine a better life if everyone were only to be punished as you desire.

do you know how a television works.

do you know how lethal injection is performed.  

did you see it on television.

do you long to turn on the television.  

do you want to pull the switch.

are you a victim.  

of course you are.