Fade

It doesn’t matter what I think
or do. No matter what I think
or do I am incorrect —
just another fool demanding
correction from the facts
of the world.

It doesn’t matter what I think
or do. Doesn’t matter
whether I understand the orchids
bought from the supermarket
or how to get them to rebloom
once they are done —

doesn’t matter that I spent too long
before the video explaining that,
that the explanation took too long
for me; involved fermenting rice water,
hosing down the leaves, above all waiting;
I watched it all and even that took too long

so I turned it off and resigned myself
to it dying untouched; that I
would enjoy the remaining flowers
wondering how long they would last
before I had to toss the entire plant aside
like so much trash and move on —

focusing instead on something else,
something I hadn’t yet thought of —
my own thinning hair; my fingers’ clumsiness
on the antique guitar; my creaking groan
every time I bent from the waist;
my shrugging off the death of the plant

and everything else
that I carried.