Tired and yet all the faces all around
say I should pep up and dance or work
to the maximum available effort but I’m
unimportant to them personally and no one
trusts that what I can do is not what needs doing.
Tired and no sense of security in place
because I am not seen as valuable and the time
I can give them is not time they care to take
so I am shunted to the side of the arena as
no one wants me in their squad or on the team.
Tired of my own self pity for certain and yet
none of the furniture offers rest and those who could
put a hand upon me and give love are present
for me as they instead prefer to tell me over and over
it is nothing personal and just survival of the liveliest.
Are you as tired of yourself as I am? Let us lean together
as the years lengthen and we droop more and more
toward the floor. Let us fling our bedding at their feet
and let them hector us until we fall asleep in their paths
hoping they’ll let us get back to our feet only when we are ready.
January 28th, 2021 at 3:23 pm
Know the feeling. I gave up caffeine, except one small coke zero a day when I literally am about to fall asleep on my feet or at my computer. It does wonders. Better than drugs or alcohol and no long term problems. Some days I don’t need it. No matter if I’m bummed about the world or just lonely or weary of putting one foot in front of the other, that small shot of caffeine gives a powerful surge of energy and even hope that I will do something positive no matter how small each day.