Weekend

I had a fairly bad weekend, 90% of which was caused by self-inflicted angst and resultant crapweasel behavior.

Most of that melted away last night with a cool set by Luke Warm Water at the Hut, followed by a serious amount of drinking that ended (for me) in the wee hours with Luke and me putting away most of a bottle of Jack Daniel’s. (I think Luke stayed up to polish it off after I staggered off to bed.) Good to talk with him — I haven’t had such a satisfying chat about Native issues and just plain old chat with a rez twist in years.

I forget sometimes that while I’ve never lived on the rez, involvement with Native issues and cultural stuff was a major part of my life for many years. If my dad gave me anything, it was that sense of pride and stubborn ownership of my heritage that I forget sometimes.

Growing up as a child of an interracial marriage was obviously huge, and while I personally try to identify myself almost always as “biracial,” someone who has the experience of living between categories, I have to admit that it’s nice on occasion to just be “Italian” or just be “Mescalero” and have the whole problematic issue melt away for a while. Does that make sense?

I find it nice to get that stuff vaildated now and again by someone like Luke, who I found I could relate to on a level I don’t often get access to.

Woke up to a minor headache and more personal crapweasel behavior, which I think I’ve finally gotten out of my system.

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I read a revised version of “Mission Statement” last night that contained the new poem “Open Mouth” in its entirety. I also read it in something slightly different than my usual breakneck style. It felt good.

I’m tired of doing oodles of new poems and not finding ways to make older work — well-known older work and overlooked poems alike — fresh again. The relentless pursuit of the new at the expense of the old is an American disease, and one I don’t wish to succumb to.

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Quick blurbs:

— tomorrow night the 7th at Gotpoetry, the humble and hilarious Mike McGee (come see him, but make sure you vote first)

— next Monday the 13th, I’ll be performing as a feature (by myself for a change) at the Stone Soup Poets in Cambridge

— next Tuesday the 14th, it’s the return of Jim’s Fall (Faro and I) to Gotpoetry Live, where the set will be filmed for a DVD

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C-ya, all…