FUCK insomnia

Awake sucks.

I’ve got a sore throat and I want to sleep. So I’ve been feeding myself small doses of Seroquel to try and get to sleep without becoming comatose.

I’m up to about 3/4 of a tab by now in the last two hours, and still nothing. (That’s about 18 mg for those keeping track — not even close to a lethal or even harmful dose. Some folks take up to 200 mg at a time; I’m just really sensitive to it.)

I seem to have misplaced my Ambien, which usually does the trick much more mildly and quickly in such small doses. Thus, the hacking of Seroquel pills.

I could really use the sleep — lots to do tomorrow, including the completion of the next Zero Point Zero column and rent payments and all sorts of things. But I also don’t want to get up at 11, so getting to sleep now is crucial.

I’m going to hit myself in the head with a hammer soon.

As long as I’ve had sleep disorders, I’ve never gotten used to them. I don’t think I ever will.