in less time than it takes
to sing about it
i fall in love

and i remain in love
for one hour
with the first five notes

of a pop song
that i will loathe
tomorrow

this is how they survive
these worthless songs
stay with me for a bit

jump from me to the next host
then replicate somewhere along
the way

there will be another soon
that sounds the same
that works the same

knowing this
i turn on the radio
waiting

there is something in
the life cycle
that draws me back

it reminds me of something
even as i scratch the wounds
where the tiny barbs were last set

i wait to love the next silly tune
though i know the things i do for love
will shred me everytime

skipped poetry last night.
will be there next week.
will be at the Nov 3rd Club reading tomorrow night.
will be at SPEAK on Wednesday.

sometime in there i’ll breathe and work.

life is a carnival/believe it or not

Pakistani authorities are reporting that there are at least 18,000 dead in the recent earthquake.

i will lay odds on two things:

— there won’t be an allstar, 3-network concert for relief;
— there will be no poems about this at next year’s NPS.

i need a war

give me a uniform
a cadence and an order

let me go
somewhere without prayers
with a brave companion

i need a weapon
a mission
an enemy

i need to fall before
a storm of enemy bullets
or a stray friendly one
for being at peace is terrifying
being alone is terrifying
being this is terrifying

i can subsume myself by being in conflict
i can call myself soldier
tell myself war is peace

but i can’t yet stand this
the thing done
the end established
the road mapped
the truce declared
the mirror clean and clear

if you are the offspring of an interracial relationship
but appear to all intents and purposes to be “white”
and are fully aware of what privileges have been accorded to you
because of your appearance,

do you have a moral obligation to make sure
that when you are called “white”
you correct the speaker and refuse that label?

MY OWN OPINION: fuck yes. every fucking time.

in my role as performance poet:

1. record a CD
2. put up a personal website
3. change my name
4. slam
5. appear on Def Poetry Jam
6. do a commercial for something profitable
7. change my appearance
8. go on a reality show
9. join academia
10. go on a reality show based in academia

things i have done/will do:

1. write my ass off
2. read well
3. be more generous to the poets around me
4. listen
5. read others’ work
6. stop using my mental illness as a crutch for shoddy behavior
7. admit that i value immortality for my work far more than my own longevity
8. admit that i am nonetheless afraid to die
9. stop letting fame be so important to me
10. return to first things and begin again

You Have Just Entered “Famous Dadaists and Surrealists” Chatroom

hawtjarry201: my milkshake brings all the buoys to the abbatoir
xxxxsdali420: <—– 93" unscathed
hawtjarry201: ROFLMAO*
hawtjarry201: this is the sorrow of the lobster's descent
cestunepipe: this is not a chatroom post
hawtjarry201: TTFN

OK, have at it.

*=Rolling on the floor lamenting my atmosphere, Osama

Pepe Le Pew Falls In Love Online

ah, my friend, the internet,
she is like the flirt!

all the time pretending that she is out there
solid as a good baguette when

truly she is a stale and fickle loaf
good only for serving memes and spam and no reason

to respond — ah, the Nigerian scammers! mwa, mwa, mwa!
ah, the penile enlargers! the generic druggists! mwa, mwa, mwa!

i shall, my darling internet, learn to hold you as the tenderest lover,
knowing all the time that you are fragile and only as deep

as I make you to be in my shallow eyes — ah,
the teen beauties! ah, the poetry pathetique! mwa, mwa, mwa!

ah, the bloggers, we who yearn for each others’ hands
to reach out and hold us, warm with comfort

and a perfume
like warm bread!

Well, I never.

of four straight days of 8-5 classes is over.

There are times when i love my job and times when i don’t.

i’d rather be writing poetry. in general, i’d rather write poetry than eat. i’d rather write poetry in general.

i have little desire to pursue a life outside of a poem.

I go into several days of 8-6 insanity at work.

I will now attempt to get several hours of sleep before I wake up again far too early.

I will not be posting any poems during this time period.

…snort…snicker…

Yeah, right.

I swear lately that I think in poetry, as Victor once said of Ellyn Maybe. (Not that I’m comparing myself to her…I’m taller, for one thing.)

It’s not entirely a good thing. I can’t seem to deal well with life outside of my understanding of it inside a poem. Gotta climb out if i’m going to maintain equilibrium and stop alienating everyone.

I will likely be up later, as always.