May 20, 2005

I’m tired; plus, a definite sense of potential joy, maybe.

By Tony Brown

Really tired.

Can’t figure out why I can’t finish this damn paper, which is three to five pages on my opinion as to whether the feminist revolution is over. Backed up by research, of course.

I just figured out why I can’t finish it — it’s a BULLSHIT TOPIC, that’s why.

It’s just a writing lab. I’m so NOT into trying to justify my opinion, which is, “Well, duh.”

Oh, boy. This bodes well for class tomorrow, doesn’t it? Another long night ahead.

********************************************************

My rough night at therapy last week seems to have been some sort of a breakthrough. I feel far less nervous about fucking up my life.

That might not be such a good thing, but then again, I don’t care as much.

I do want to be happy, though. I am owed that — at least, I feel deserving at the moment. I feel like it’s ok to be happy.

Still not pure unadulterated happiness, you’ll note — more the feeling that when I am eventually happy it will be ok to feel that way. I am prepared to be happy. I am open to the possibility of happiness. I am pre-happy.

I could fuck this up, I know. But I am ok about moving somewhat forward.

Hooray, I suppose.

About Tony Brown

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A poet with a history in slam, lots of publications; my personal poetry and a little bit of daily life and opinions. Read the page called "About..." for the details. View all posts by Tony Brown
This entry was posted on Friday, May 20th, 2005 at 2:03 pm and posted in uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.

4 responses to “I’m tired; plus, a definite sense of potential joy, maybe.”

  • pleepleus
    May 20th, 2005 at 9:18 pm

    I do want to be happy, though. I am owed that — at least, I feel deserving at the moment. I feel like it’s ok to be happy.

    Yes, you do deserve to be happy.

    “A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes.” ~ Hugh Downs

    Reply
  • pleepleus
    May 20th, 2005 at 9:18 pm

    I do want to be happy, though. I am owed that — at least, I feel deserving at the moment. I feel like it’s ok to be happy.

    Yes, you do deserve to be happy.

    “A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes.” ~ Hugh Downs

    Reply
  • pleepleus
    May 20th, 2005 at 9:18 pm

    I do want to be happy, though. I am owed that — at least, I feel deserving at the moment. I feel like it’s ok to be happy.

    Yes, you do deserve to be happy.

    “A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes.” ~ Hugh Downs

    Reply
  • pleepleus
    May 20th, 2005 at 9:18 pm

    I do want to be happy, though. I am owed that — at least, I feel deserving at the moment. I feel like it’s ok to be happy.

    Yes, you do deserve to be happy.

    “A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes.” ~ Hugh Downs

    Reply

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