— Sis is out of the hospital. Diagnosis: schizo-affective disorder. A thought disorder involving aural and visual hallucinations and other Fun Psychotic Stuff. We’ve been talking regularly and I think she’s relatively stable right now, but recovery/stability are relative terms.
Welcome to the ward.
— My own condition: eh. I’m beginning to notice some of the long-term effects of bipolar illness — cognitive breaks, short and long term memory disturbance, and my favorite, the Suddenly Forgetting How To Talk in the middle of sentences symptom. On the other hand, I’m not making bizarre accusations or freaking out all over friends, at least not at the moment. Like I said: eh.
This long term stuff is only now getting researched, so I may volunteer for a study. Eh, again.
— Had a preliminary, tentative conversation today regarding the possibility of some form of limited disability/reasonable accommodation stuff here. This is confronting beyond belief. I’ve always worked from the inside of my brain out to the world; thinking that I might lose that is pretty sobering.
We’re not talking Alzheimer’s here, although the physiological effects are in fact similar — plaques on the neurons, cell loss, etc. — and there are plenty of things I can do to keep myself sharp (omega-3s, hydration, exercise, mental stimulation like puzzles and surprise, creative pursuits!), but nonetheless…eh. Eh.
I fear I’ll never be able to maintain work/school/poetry at the same level.
Some of it is likely age, too. And that has its own fears. I realize I’m much older than most of the poets around me, and it’s starting to tell. Aging out of the scene and little to fall back on as to performance venues, and little energy to create my own.
You know…eh.
— Anyway, testing my limits: bringing a guitar to the WAG for the open mike tonight. Might sing just to scare myself and others. Might just wuss out and do poetry about knifefights and suicide.
Say it with me: eh.
Dark Matter 
April 22nd, 2005 at 2:13 pm
Re: 38 is the new 26
LOlOLOLOllolol! Also, I have so many mental conditions that, well, so does everyone else.
Someday, the DSMIV is going to list “sanity” as a psychological condition.
April 22nd, 2005 at 2:13 pm
Re: 38 is the new 26
LOlOLOLOllolol! Also, I have so many mental conditions that, well, so does everyone else.
Someday, the DSMIV is going to list “sanity” as a psychological condition.
April 22nd, 2005 at 2:13 pm
Re: 38 is the new 26
LOlOLOLOllolol! Also, I have so many mental conditions that, well, so does everyone else.
Someday, the DSMIV is going to list “sanity” as a psychological condition.
April 22nd, 2005 at 2:13 pm
Re: 38 is the new 26
LOlOLOLOllolol! Also, I have so many mental conditions that, well, so does everyone else.
Someday, the DSMIV is going to list “sanity” as a psychological condition.
April 22nd, 2005 at 2:13 pm
Re: 38 is the new 26
LOlOLOLOllolol! Also, I have so many mental conditions that, well, so does everyone else.
Someday, the DSMIV is going to list “sanity” as a psychological condition.
April 22nd, 2005 at 2:13 pm
Re: 38 is the new 26
LOlOLOLOllolol! Also, I have so many mental conditions that, well, so does everyone else.
Someday, the DSMIV is going to list “sanity” as a psychological condition.
April 22nd, 2005 at 3:22 am
Yup. That’s on the list.
April 22nd, 2005 at 3:22 am
Yup. That’s on the list.
April 22nd, 2005 at 3:22 am
Yup. That’s on the list.
April 22nd, 2005 at 3:22 am
Yup. That’s on the list.
April 22nd, 2005 at 3:22 am
Yup. That’s on the list.
April 22nd, 2005 at 3:22 am
Yup. That’s on the list.
April 22nd, 2005 at 2:06 am
First: eh.
Second: I heard recently from someone who’s a news junkie that there’s a study saying that people with memory problems (Alzheimer’s, etc) will increase their ability to function by doing crossword puzzles. Just an idea…
April 22nd, 2005 at 2:06 am
First: eh.
Second: I heard recently from someone who’s a news junkie that there’s a study saying that people with memory problems (Alzheimer’s, etc) will increase their ability to function by doing crossword puzzles. Just an idea…
April 22nd, 2005 at 2:06 am
First: eh.
Second: I heard recently from someone who’s a news junkie that there’s a study saying that people with memory problems (Alzheimer’s, etc) will increase their ability to function by doing crossword puzzles. Just an idea…
April 22nd, 2005 at 2:06 am
First: eh.
Second: I heard recently from someone who’s a news junkie that there’s a study saying that people with memory problems (Alzheimer’s, etc) will increase their ability to function by doing crossword puzzles. Just an idea…
April 22nd, 2005 at 2:06 am
First: eh.
Second: I heard recently from someone who’s a news junkie that there’s a study saying that people with memory problems (Alzheimer’s, etc) will increase their ability to function by doing crossword puzzles. Just an idea…
April 22nd, 2005 at 2:06 am
First: eh.
Second: I heard recently from someone who’s a news junkie that there’s a study saying that people with memory problems (Alzheimer’s, etc) will increase their ability to function by doing crossword puzzles. Just an idea…
April 21st, 2005 at 11:24 pm
sorry
Hi,
Sorry to hear about your sister. It
s a lot to deal with when you have your own issues. Or maybe it just makes your own magnified.
You talked about being mixed blood. I fermly believe that we… as humans.. need to look at what our ancesters did, ate, etc. And I believe being part of a socity that doesn’t eat or is as active or has real “community” elders and such, that we do get other things going on with us.
Mixed bloods, thouhgh, I think have a unique chalange… to find out what our mix needs in partiular. And what we should stay away from. Also growing up in more than one culture, gives us advantages and disadvantages, mentaly.
And I am also in that older club… though not a poet. But what you are lossing, you are making up with life experance that can be writen about, that the kids just can’t see yet.
April 21st, 2005 at 11:24 pm
sorry
Hi,
Sorry to hear about your sister. It
s a lot to deal with when you have your own issues. Or maybe it just makes your own magnified.
You talked about being mixed blood. I fermly believe that we… as humans.. need to look at what our ancesters did, ate, etc. And I believe being part of a socity that doesn’t eat or is as active or has real “community” elders and such, that we do get other things going on with us.
Mixed bloods, thouhgh, I think have a unique chalange… to find out what our mix needs in partiular. And what we should stay away from. Also growing up in more than one culture, gives us advantages and disadvantages, mentaly.
And I am also in that older club… though not a poet. But what you are lossing, you are making up with life experance that can be writen about, that the kids just can’t see yet.
April 21st, 2005 at 11:24 pm
sorry
Hi,
Sorry to hear about your sister. It
s a lot to deal with when you have your own issues. Or maybe it just makes your own magnified.
You talked about being mixed blood. I fermly believe that we… as humans.. need to look at what our ancesters did, ate, etc. And I believe being part of a socity that doesn’t eat or is as active or has real “community” elders and such, that we do get other things going on with us.
Mixed bloods, thouhgh, I think have a unique chalange… to find out what our mix needs in partiular. And what we should stay away from. Also growing up in more than one culture, gives us advantages and disadvantages, mentaly.
And I am also in that older club… though not a poet. But what you are lossing, you are making up with life experance that can be writen about, that the kids just can’t see yet.
April 21st, 2005 at 11:24 pm
sorry
Hi,
Sorry to hear about your sister. It
s a lot to deal with when you have your own issues. Or maybe it just makes your own magnified.
You talked about being mixed blood. I fermly believe that we… as humans.. need to look at what our ancesters did, ate, etc. And I believe being part of a socity that doesn’t eat or is as active or has real “community” elders and such, that we do get other things going on with us.
Mixed bloods, thouhgh, I think have a unique chalange… to find out what our mix needs in partiular. And what we should stay away from. Also growing up in more than one culture, gives us advantages and disadvantages, mentaly.
And I am also in that older club… though not a poet. But what you are lossing, you are making up with life experance that can be writen about, that the kids just can’t see yet.
April 21st, 2005 at 11:24 pm
sorry
Hi,
Sorry to hear about your sister. It
s a lot to deal with when you have your own issues. Or maybe it just makes your own magnified.
You talked about being mixed blood. I fermly believe that we… as humans.. need to look at what our ancesters did, ate, etc. And I believe being part of a socity that doesn’t eat or is as active or has real “community” elders and such, that we do get other things going on with us.
Mixed bloods, thouhgh, I think have a unique chalange… to find out what our mix needs in partiular. And what we should stay away from. Also growing up in more than one culture, gives us advantages and disadvantages, mentaly.
And I am also in that older club… though not a poet. But what you are lossing, you are making up with life experance that can be writen about, that the kids just can’t see yet.
April 21st, 2005 at 11:24 pm
sorry
Hi,
Sorry to hear about your sister. It
s a lot to deal with when you have your own issues. Or maybe it just makes your own magnified.
You talked about being mixed blood. I fermly believe that we… as humans.. need to look at what our ancesters did, ate, etc. And I believe being part of a socity that doesn’t eat or is as active or has real “community” elders and such, that we do get other things going on with us.
Mixed bloods, thouhgh, I think have a unique chalange… to find out what our mix needs in partiular. And what we should stay away from. Also growing up in more than one culture, gives us advantages and disadvantages, mentaly.
And I am also in that older club… though not a poet. But what you are lossing, you are making up with life experance that can be writen about, that the kids just can’t see yet.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:53 pm
You’re on!
April 21st, 2005 at 7:53 pm
You’re on!
April 21st, 2005 at 7:53 pm
You’re on!
April 21st, 2005 at 7:53 pm
You’re on!
April 21st, 2005 at 7:53 pm
You’re on!
April 21st, 2005 at 7:53 pm
You’re on!
April 21st, 2005 at 7:50 pm
what if we made the knives out of graham crackers?
April 21st, 2005 at 7:50 pm
what if we made the knives out of graham crackers?
April 21st, 2005 at 7:50 pm
what if we made the knives out of graham crackers?
April 21st, 2005 at 7:50 pm
what if we made the knives out of graham crackers?
April 21st, 2005 at 7:50 pm
what if we made the knives out of graham crackers?
April 21st, 2005 at 7:50 pm
what if we made the knives out of graham crackers?
April 21st, 2005 at 7:40 pm
oh, dear ms C, I gave that up as a hobby years ago. right now, i’m not sure how I feel about that.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:40 pm
oh, dear ms C, I gave that up as a hobby years ago. right now, i’m not sure how I feel about that.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:40 pm
oh, dear ms C, I gave that up as a hobby years ago. right now, i’m not sure how I feel about that.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:40 pm
oh, dear ms C, I gave that up as a hobby years ago. right now, i’m not sure how I feel about that.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:40 pm
oh, dear ms C, I gave that up as a hobby years ago. right now, i’m not sure how I feel about that.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:40 pm
oh, dear ms C, I gave that up as a hobby years ago. right now, i’m not sure how I feel about that.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:36 pm
if it will help keep you sharp, you and i can get in a REAL knifefight sometime. solidarity fist, brother. eh.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:36 pm
if it will help keep you sharp, you and i can get in a REAL knifefight sometime. solidarity fist, brother. eh.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:36 pm
if it will help keep you sharp, you and i can get in a REAL knifefight sometime. solidarity fist, brother. eh.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:36 pm
if it will help keep you sharp, you and i can get in a REAL knifefight sometime. solidarity fist, brother. eh.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:36 pm
if it will help keep you sharp, you and i can get in a REAL knifefight sometime. solidarity fist, brother. eh.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:36 pm
if it will help keep you sharp, you and i can get in a REAL knifefight sometime. solidarity fist, brother. eh.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:03 pm
eh.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:03 pm
eh.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:03 pm
eh.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:03 pm
eh.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:03 pm
eh.
April 21st, 2005 at 7:03 pm
eh.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:44 pm
38 is the new 26
I am also much older than most poets — 38 in a few days
welcome to the 38 club where we party like its 1985
oh, i almost forgot… eh
April 21st, 2005 at 6:44 pm
38 is the new 26
I am also much older than most poets — 38 in a few days
welcome to the 38 club where we party like its 1985
oh, i almost forgot… eh
April 21st, 2005 at 6:44 pm
38 is the new 26
I am also much older than most poets — 38 in a few days
welcome to the 38 club where we party like its 1985
oh, i almost forgot… eh
April 21st, 2005 at 6:44 pm
38 is the new 26
I am also much older than most poets — 38 in a few days
welcome to the 38 club where we party like its 1985
oh, i almost forgot… eh
April 21st, 2005 at 6:44 pm
38 is the new 26
I am also much older than most poets — 38 in a few days
welcome to the 38 club where we party like its 1985
oh, i almost forgot… eh
April 21st, 2005 at 6:44 pm
38 is the new 26
I am also much older than most poets — 38 in a few days
welcome to the 38 club where we party like its 1985
oh, i almost forgot… eh
April 21st, 2005 at 6:20 pm
eh.
I am also much older than most poets — 38 in a few days — and it does show. I can’t party, really, due to my own disabilities, and I end up feeling like some old maid.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:20 pm
eh.
I am also much older than most poets — 38 in a few days — and it does show. I can’t party, really, due to my own disabilities, and I end up feeling like some old maid.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:20 pm
eh.
I am also much older than most poets — 38 in a few days — and it does show. I can’t party, really, due to my own disabilities, and I end up feeling like some old maid.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:20 pm
eh.
I am also much older than most poets — 38 in a few days — and it does show. I can’t party, really, due to my own disabilities, and I end up feeling like some old maid.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:20 pm
eh.
I am also much older than most poets — 38 in a few days — and it does show. I can’t party, really, due to my own disabilities, and I end up feeling like some old maid.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:20 pm
eh.
I am also much older than most poets — 38 in a few days — and it does show. I can’t party, really, due to my own disabilities, and I end up feeling like some old maid.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:14 pm
eh… i hear a poem coming on.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:14 pm
eh… i hear a poem coming on.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:14 pm
eh… i hear a poem coming on.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:14 pm
eh… i hear a poem coming on.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:14 pm
eh… i hear a poem coming on.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:14 pm
eh… i hear a poem coming on.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:13 pm
I hear you, bro.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:13 pm
I hear you, bro.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:13 pm
I hear you, bro.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:13 pm
I hear you, bro.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:13 pm
I hear you, bro.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:13 pm
I hear you, bro.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:07 pm
Fortunately, I love salmon and eat it a couple times a week.
I think it’s the cow brains I’ll have to give up.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:07 pm
Fortunately, I love salmon and eat it a couple times a week.
I think it’s the cow brains I’ll have to give up.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:07 pm
Fortunately, I love salmon and eat it a couple times a week.
I think it’s the cow brains I’ll have to give up.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:07 pm
Fortunately, I love salmon and eat it a couple times a week.
I think it’s the cow brains I’ll have to give up.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:07 pm
Fortunately, I love salmon and eat it a couple times a week.
I think it’s the cow brains I’ll have to give up.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:07 pm
Fortunately, I love salmon and eat it a couple times a week.
I think it’s the cow brains I’ll have to give up.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:06 pm
Maybe eat some salmon. I don’t know. I wanted to say something helpful. Sorry that you feel, “Eh”. That sucks more than actually feeling something.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:06 pm
Maybe eat some salmon. I don’t know. I wanted to say something helpful. Sorry that you feel, “Eh”. That sucks more than actually feeling something.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:06 pm
Maybe eat some salmon. I don’t know. I wanted to say something helpful. Sorry that you feel, “Eh”. That sucks more than actually feeling something.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:06 pm
Maybe eat some salmon. I don’t know. I wanted to say something helpful. Sorry that you feel, “Eh”. That sucks more than actually feeling something.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:06 pm
Maybe eat some salmon. I don’t know. I wanted to say something helpful. Sorry that you feel, “Eh”. That sucks more than actually feeling something.
April 21st, 2005 at 6:06 pm
Maybe eat some salmon. I don’t know. I wanted to say something helpful. Sorry that you feel, “Eh”. That sucks more than actually feeling something.