August 28, 2004

By Tony Brown

I feel somewhat better today, but not great.

I want to feel good again. I’d settle for good.

I feel distant from things. Unable to touch, or to be touched.

I, I, I. Bipolar is such a narcissistic condition.

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SPEAK on Wednesday was great. Our second anniversary. I turned the selection of themes over to the group, and there was great enthusiasm. Will post them later.

Also: we remain at twice a month, and we won’t be having features except on an occasional basis. (Like Rachel Kann on 9/22.)

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I still have nothing to say about the column.

The problem with treating writing as a spiritual practice is that when the spirit isn’t willing, the weak flesh feels justified in sitting it out.

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Thanks to javabill and thisrabbit for offering a sympathetic place to hang last night. If I hadn’t talked, I would have exploded.

As it is, I’m sadder but wiser now. Maybe wiser can lead to happier. That would be nice.

I’ve always been of the mindset that I had to figure everything out rationally when I had a problem — which may be why I do so poorly with irrational issues, twisted and complex emotions.

Maybe wiser can lead to happier. Maybe it can’t.

I’m willing to entertain that possibility.

About Tony Brown

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A poet with a history in slam, lots of publications; my personal poetry and a little bit of daily life and opinions. Read the page called "About..." for the details. View all posts by Tony Brown
This entry was posted on Saturday, August 28th, 2004 at 2:22 pm and posted in uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.

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