Memory lapses on important details I should not forget.
Not receiving return e-mails about stuff that you thought was crucial.
The feeling I get when I contemplate the possibilities inherent in the word “incurable”.
Fear of losing my mind.
Fear of losing myself.
Fear of fear: the sense that I am ruled in so many ways by fear.
The fact that I do not dream. That my dreams seem inaccessible to me.
Self-pity, and the vicious circle that creates it and sustains it.
My self-image.
My lack of conviction.
Dark Matter 