This Man IS A Hospital

Revised, from 2021.

He was born 
in a hospital
and somehow
became a hospital

It started early with him admitting
every sick arrival
Lining them up
deep in his hallways

Soon couldn’t help but live his life
stumbling between chronic and acute
manic and depressive
expressive and catatonic 

Rough way to live
he tells himself whenever
the crush inside him
becomes nearly intolerable

Followed at once by
a sigh and a shrug
Reminds himself
it was his choice to let them in

His fault entirely
He’s so damn full
of pestilence that he
can’t walk straight or think

healthy thoughts
Looks up at the pictures
of his family on the walls
The founders of the institution

The ones who set the mission
on its path
Trips over an old corpse
Chokes on the facts

It’s not their fault I’m a hospital
he tells himself
I ought to be used to this
by now

The fact that I’m not
is my fault too
He pulls himself up
by the gurneys

Lives his life
on the ICU floor
answering pages
and praying he will code