Unquiet Desperation

A formal peace
has descended upon me
after rejecting bondage
by my own expectations: for example,

daylight outside keeps changing
from clouded to bright.  Because
I had no television on this morning
I did not expect this.

Nothing that it is happening
has been anticipated.  I am free
to just react and then act.  I am free
because of refusal to do

what I always do. Stubborn
rebellion against what is expected,
no matter how small, is called for.
Living as others do is uncalled for

in a land of quiet desperation.
Every third person is dying
from slow suicide.  Yes, I may end up
dead more swiftly this way. Ah, well.