Ah, you stupid
motherfucker — cold drunk crashing
right through the knee-high fence
in your own front yard and planting your face
among the weed-strangled old tulips!
Right throught the old weak fence
and right down on your old weak face
in the front yard where the neighbors can see —
And you don’t seem to be getting up
and getting inside to hide the shame this time.
Not this time, not like you usually do.
You seem instead content to lie there ass up
for all the neighbors to see — your grey old fatness
unmoving, and it’s been a while now.
You’ve been a stupid mother since you were a kid
and none of us can count how often
you’ve tripped over that fence when stupidly, completely
drunk. Stupid and complete drunk, that’s what you are —
the object lesson, the model for everyone to point at;
but you appear to be taking the lesson
in a new direction today, with your face down
in the dead tuilps and and your ample ass sticking up.
You’ve been there a bit and it’s likely the best job
you’ve ever had, no real effort required, just lie there
and let the neighbors point and laugh and say things
to their kids about being drunk and a public spectacle.
You’re gonna feel stupid about this one day, motherfucker.
We’re never gonna let you live this one down,
especially now that a crow, a real live crow,
has landed next to you and is inspecting you
up close and personal. Never gonna let you live
this one down, asshole. Priceless. I’m gonna see
if I can get close and snap a picture of this.