Not This Year

not this year
no
I will let go
I will face planes and towers falling
say
yes to friends lost there
and no to
being told
ordered
compelled to recall
every damn detail
in service to
overwrought agendas

how many houses
in how many countries have fallen
and no one remembers them

how many terrors are there
to tame

how many names unspoken
on bitter tongues

no exceptions

mourn the dead long enough
you mourn yourself into the holes
left behind
it’s a long climb out

I am climbing

damn the demand for excruciating recall
I want to forget everything
except how my friends smiled
and that all over the world
for far longer than ten years
everyone else has always known
death makes no exceptions
for the flags people die under