That word
means “disregard.”

It means “no need to listen.”
It means “less than.”

It means “ha ha, ahem, thanks,
let’s move on, shall we?”

That cyanide word,
bitter scent in your air.

That devouring word,
you are minced and eaten by a nibbling horde.

That word is a pat on the head
so hard it shortens you.

That word, like any label,
is used to assign you a place on the shelf:

something
unnecessary at the moment.

Something that will sit there
until it becomes poisonous

and can be discarded
with a clear conscience.

When word reaches you
that he is “boning your girlfriend,”
consider that the word “boning”
as an angler uses it
implies a change
from a catch and release policy
to one of greater commitment.

From where you stand
they’re apparently
passing a joint on her back porch.
“Bone” is of course
another word for “joint”
and for one second you allow yourself
to think that maybe
this is the type of boning
the gossip means: the sharing
of substances.  And then you think,
of course it is that exactly, no matter
what “bone” refers to.

Ah, rationality:
the fisher tosses his line,
decides that this one, he’ll keep
and consume.  You catch a hint
of his catch and try to shake it off,
but the hook’s in and set now.
Smoke’s a bait, lure, scent in the water,
and you take it knowing it’s fatal.
He’s boning your girlfriend.
He’s boning your girlfriend.
There are limits.

First, you’re
the broken drawer
that chirps when I pull
hard and and fast.
The back falls off
and spills the junk inside
down into the limbo
behind.  The thing I want most,
what drew me to reach for the pull
in the first place, is stuck
back there beyond my reach —

how dare you laugh
at me, lie there in mocking pieces
that scold me for an inability
to get at it? 

Then, you’re the file,
corrupted and infirm
on my drive.  Not working,
not even a little, sitting there
as a reminder of functionality:

how dare you
sit and spin endlessly
pretending that something
is going to happen?

Then, you’re
the viral video
being seen by all the curious idlers
on the planet.  You’re caught
by accident doing something ridiculous
like loving me, protesting
to anyone who’ll listen
that it was all a mistake
and you’re not really like that.

How dare you
squawk like this, as if
you didn’t hand me the camera
and tell me how to push the buttons?

Finally, you’re every day
full of errors that leave me
trying to figure out
what went wrong,
when what went wrong
is that the day began and progressed
and aged and ended as it always does.

W’ere in the modern world
with its overabundance
and instant access.  How dare you
accuse me of anachronism,
suggesting that there is agency
and cause and effect
in my stumbling
through it? 

It’s all new.
Neither of us has it locked down yet.

Oh Stella,
we need to talk —
we really need to talk.

The conversation will likely go
to expected places — three common chords,
some modified to add space; switched rhythms
to amuse us both; misplaced fingers that sometimes
surprise and sometimes lead to pain;
nothing inspiring or novel on most days.

Once in a while, though, I stretch
and we find something together
that I thought was forever beyond me,
and I’m young again.  I learn something 
about leaving well enough alone
and breaking what’s not broken
and I’m young again with your neck
under one stumbling hand
and your body springing to life
under the other.  We shout low
or whisper loud where we once
repeated what we’d always said.

Sometimes I resist the urge
to close and say everything on my mind.
I hold back that last home tone
and leave the root unresolved.
Those days, Stella, I can feel us
bending back to the past
where every conversation
was always left unfinished
to be taken up again tomorrow —
those days, Stella, old girl,
when we talked and talked
and always found new things to say.

This fretting hand of mine is cramped
and you need new strings;
we’re both showing our age
in every uncleated crack and stain;
yet sometimes, Stella,
and today is one of those days,
we really need to dig in, lift ourselves
out of the rut,
and talk and talk and talk.