Testing

Is the man who learns from swallowed stones less a learned man
than he who sits up and begs for easy knowledge
dispensed like treats to a trick dog, taking in whatever is offered
regardless of effort expended or potential for poisoning?
At least the stone eater knows how his teeth will crack
as he chews the hard lessons and struggle them down.
At least if he is cut by his own broken teeth
he knows the pain is immediate and if it scars him
he will have the scars to remind him of what he learned.

Is the woman who climbs the sheer wall of her prison
less a climber than the one who rides a proffered elevator
or ladder, giving up a piece of herself to gain escape
and then to walk the world with a piece of herself left behind?
At least the climber who attempts to summit the prison wall
owns the chance of falling and shattering, and if
she is broken into shards they will lie close together
in the landing, no need to search for what’s been lost there;
if she succeeds with her ragged nails still on her hands
she will always know what she can do once they grow back.

If we fail and fail again, struggling with every fall,
standing up on telescoped legs, swallowing our own blood
raised to our mouths by biting through our own tongues
in an effort to stop repeating the wrong words again;

if we stagger, if we stumble, if to be ourselves we try on
mask after mask to see what fits and then finally with irritation
toss the false face into a battered can and call out
that we will face the world now without disguise,

will we be less worthy of love and honor
than those who smiled, nodded, bent their backs as directed
to bear the traditional loads of straw and brick —
those who did not understand and turned and sneered at us
and gave us the backs of their heads in response to our cries
for help in a time of need?  Or will we spit stones at them
from the tops of their walls?  Will we then teach them to live
as we were taught to live, or will we say
we understand so much they do not know that a lifetime
is not enough time for the learning, and turn our backs on them
to build anew?