If you see me
in clown makeup
waving a dagger,
please don’t panic; believe the smile
that I’ve painted on
and ignore the edge.
Would a clown
bearing gifts
lie to you?
If you see me
in clown makeup
waving a dagger,
please don’t panic; believe the smile
that I’ve painted on
and ignore the edge.
Would a clown
bearing gifts
lie to you?
Cold water
tastes of black;
warm tea,
redolent with spice-red brown;
all cheeses
contain a trace of green,
and meats of all varieties
are purple as they go down.
Landscape art
on the teeth and tongue,
a portrait within me later.
There’s a golden tinge
in the bourbon that follows;
there was shell gesso
in my former hunger, orange bile
in my gluttony’s later gut.
I live like this, in agony,
stunned and overwhelmed by every meal.
I can’t stop the pictures.
I can’t eat enough to get to
the absence of light
I so long for. And
I have tried, Lord,
I have tried.