Call Center Incident

The first words
out of her mouth
are,

“why are you working on Thanksgiving?”

and I hold my tongue
instead of saying,

“why are you shopping on Thanksgiving?”

Later in the call
(which is far longer
than our four minute standard
and I’ll probably get written up for it)
she tells me

her son’s moved out of state
to be with his girlfriend
who has a huge chest
and do I think the XL or the 1X
would be a better fit?  I say

I would go with the 1X
based on her description,

and she says she also has a huge chest
and both her sons were always
tit clutchers, and she’s had long talks
with the girlfriend about that.

OK, I say,
and we’re running a special today,

as a thank you you can have
another one or two items
at 15% off,

she declines at first but then
goes silent,

I can hear the pages flipping,
she’s looking for something else to buy,
a perfect gift,
mentions the other son
doesn’t talk to her at all,

I take another bite
of the cold apple pie
the company’s so thoughtfully provided,
and I’ll be damned
if I hurry her along.